Hi, I'm Cat, And I Don't Own A TV

When I tell people I don’t own a TV, they look at me like I just admitted I’ve never heard of Netflix and I might be unaware that the planet is round. But here’s the thing: cutting out TV wasn’t some grand, "I'm too good for it" move. It was a decision I made because I wanted to stop letting other people’s stories occupy real estate in my mind. I'm talking to you, CSI, The Bachelor, and network news spin cycle!

"Because when you clear the mental clutter, the rest of your life has no choice but to follow. "

When you choose what to watch, read, or listen to, you’re choosing your thoughts. And those thoughts? They’re shaping your life. I'll wait while your brain serves you the list of shows currently shaping your life... how do you feel about that lineup? The media you consume influences your decisions, confidence, attitude, and future. Sounds dramatic? Maybe. But it's true. Every time you click ‘play’ on another episode or scroll through another news feed, you’re feeding your mind something that might not even belong there.

You come here for hard truths, right? Well, here it is : what you consume today will be your reality tomorrow. Someone pass out the Band-Aids, I just got sliced by that! And just like a Band Aid...that crap you watch is going to stick to all of the wrong and uncomfortable pieces parts; abrasive, living rent free in your head, holding up authentic growth, making you feel less than and needing more stuff; rinse, repeat, watch another episode and eat more chips. Just one more episode before I get busy building a life I don't want to escape from, maybe one more before I schedule the posts that could be monetized on Facebook to build the time freedom business you say you want. And like the community beach sand from Love Island rubbing your (insert your choice of anatomy here) wrong during the three-hour finale... ain't nobody got time for that. Especially your brain, future, and epic plans for your life and relationships.

So, I stopped consuming things that didn’t serve me. And yes, that meant cutting out the mindless TV shows and the endless scrolling on social media. But here’s the kicker: You don’t need to know everything. You need to focus on less. Just like when I broke up with Oreos, Martinis, Doritos, and shady "friends"...if I don't add them to my shopping cart, those bitches can't live in my kitchen and influence my decisions or future. No access, no problems. My TV has been repurposed as my monitor for the last four years. I tossed out the remote control...just in case.

Focus on the stuff that actually moves the needle in your life. I’m talking about the things that challenge you to think differently, that push you to grow, that spark new ideas, not the things that drain you, stress you out, or make you feel like you’re not doing enough or being enough.

How TV (and Your Digital Diet) Might Be Holding You Back

Look, I’m not here to tell you that TV is the devil. But you do need to ask yourself: how much time are you spending absorbing things that have zero impact on your personal growth? The shows you’re watching, are they making you feel inspired, energized, and ready to take on the world? Or are they just taking up space in your brain, leaving you numb and lazy to the stuff that matters?

You have a choice. You can spend your time absorbing noise that doesn’t bring you closer to your goals, or you can reclaim that time and focus it on things that help you level up. And now that you read this far, this isn't just about TV. It’s about everything you’re letting in.

One Thing I Want You to Try This Week:

I’m challenging you to take a hard look at your “digital diet.” Is there something you’re consuming that’s leaving you feeling drained or stuck? Maybe it’s a show, a social media account, or a constant stream of news that’s making you feel like the world is falling apart.

Here’s the challenge: 

Stop consuming one thing that’s making you feel less like yourself.

It could be that mindless TV binge, the endless scroll, or the toxic friend you keep following. Let it go for a week and see what happens. I want you to clear some space: space to think, to breathe, and to focus on what matters. I promise you, your mind will feel clearer, your energy will shift, and your focus will come back stronger than ever.

So, are you in? Drop me a comment, shoot me a message, or just hit "like" if you’re taking this challenge. Let’s do it together. Because when you clear the mental clutter, the rest of your life has no choice but to follow.  Accountability. I know that part is scary...but you're not in this alone, I am right here with you!

And just in case you are like me and need some "prove it sauce" on your movie theatre popcorn, here's oodles of it:

The Science Behind the Screen:

How TV and Excessive Screen Time Affect Your Brain

When you choose what to watch or read, you're not just passing time, you're shaping your brain's wiring and, ultimately, your identity. Research has shown that excessive screen time, including TV viewing, can have tangible effects on brain structure and mental health.

1. Impact on Brain Development

Prolonged screen time has been linked to changes in brain structure. Studies indicate that excessive screen use can lead to thinning of the cerebral cortex, a region associated with critical thinking and decision-making. This thinning may impair cognitive functions and academic performance.

2. Mental Health Implications

Excessive screen time, particularly on social media and mobile devices, has been associated with increased risks of depression and anxiety. A study involving over 4,000 humans found that those exhibiting addictive behaviors related to screen use were two to three times more likely to experience suicidal thoughts and other mental health challenges.

3. Disruption of Sleep Patterns

Screen time, especially before bedtime, can interfere with sleep quality. The blue light emitted by screens disrupts melatonin production, making it harder to fall asleep. Poor sleep has been linked to various mental health issues, including depression and anxiety.

4. Decreased Productivity

Excessive screen time can lead to decreased productivity. Constant notifications and the habit of checking devices frequently can disrupt focus and reduce efficiency. Studies have shown that individuals who frequently check their devices experience a decrease in productivity due to constant interruptions.

5. Cognitive Decline

Prolonged exposure to screens, especially without breaks, can lead to cognitive decline. Binge-watching, for instance, has been associated with poor sleep quality, increased fatigue, and cognitive decline over time.

Ready to ditch the mental chaos and start taking control? Subscribe for emails packed with real talk, actionable strategies, and the motivation you need to build the life you want. You don't have to do it alone, I’m here with you. Sign up here: https://www.catrainwater.com/

Keep going!

xoxo Cat

Kill Your Darlings: The Art of Letting Go for Bigger Growth

"Killing your darlings also means killing the need for validation from a world that doesn’t know how to handle women who refuse to shrink. You don’t owe anyone an explanation for growing into your fullest self."

If you've spent time in the writing, business, or personal reinvention, you’ve probably heard the phrase kill your darlings. It’s a gut-punch of advice, first attributed to William Faulkner and later echoed by Stephen King:

"Kill your darlings, kill your darlings, even when it breaks your egocentric little scribbler’s heart, kill your darlings."

At its core, it means this: Be ruthless about cutting what no longer serves the bigger picture. Even if you love it. Even if you poured your heart into it. Even if you swore it was the thing that would make it all work. However, this advice isn’t just for writers struggling with bloated manuscripts. It’s for anyone navigating change.

There comes a point in our healing journeys where we have to stop running from our dark passengers; the heavy, macabre darlings we strap onto our backs, carrying them around like proof of our pain. We wear them like a badge, as if showing the world our trauma will somehow make it easier to bear.

But here’s the truth: It won’t.

No more fleeing the scene when they arrive. No more peeking into dark closets that once housed your shame skeletons. No more gripping that last scrap of blame that keeps you tethered to what was, instead of stepping fully into what is.

It’s time to kill your darlings.

What Needs to Go?

This isn’t just about past wounds. Killing your darlings means cutting away anything that no longer serves your next level:

• The business offering you’ve outgrown. You built it, you love it... but it’s no longer aligned with where you’re going.

  
  

• The relationship that keeps you small. You’ve twisted yourself in knots trying to make it work, but deep down, you know it’s holding you back.

  
  

• The identity built on old pain. You are not what happened to you. Stop carrying it like a permanent tattoo.

  
  

• The version of yourself that once felt safe. The people-pleasing, the perfectionism, the fear-driven choices; these might have served you once. But not anymore.

  
  

• The need for closure that will never come. Some people will never understand, never apologize, never make it right. Let that be okay.

  
  

• The obsession with being “right.” Let go of the courtroom battle in your head. Your peace is more valuable than winning an argument that will never be resolved.

  
  

• Other people’s opinions and societal expectations. Midlife women are constantly fed a script: be nice, be small, be grateful for what you have. But what if we don’t want to play that role anymore? What if we’re done shaping ourselves to fit into a mold that was never meant for us? Killing your darlings also means killing the need for validation from a world that doesn’t know how to handle women who refuse to shrink. You don’t owe anyone an explanation for growing into your fullest self.

  
  

We like to think that if we just keep telling the story: replaying the moment, analyzing the pain, explaining why it wasn’t fair, then maybe, just maybe, we’ll get the justice we deserve. But healing doesn’t work that way.

At some point, you stop trying to convince other people to do the right thing. You simply observe their choices and behavior, understand their character, and decide what you’re going to allow in your life. It’s that simple. And that hard.

The Science of Holding On (And Letting Go)

Here’s what’s happening in our brains and bodies when we cling to old narratives:

Why We Replay Painful Stories

Our brains are wired for pattern recognition and survival. When we experience emotional pain, especially trauma or deep disappointment, the amygdala (the part of the brain responsible for processing fear and emotional responses) goes into overdrive. It flags the experience as dangerous and stores it in our memory, often linking it to other similar events.

Meanwhile, the prefrontal cortex, which helps with logic and reasoning, struggles to override the emotional weight of the experience. This is why even years later, certain memories can feel just as raw as the day they happened. Replaying painful moments activates the same neural pathways as the original experience, meaning your body literally relives the stress. This is called rumination, and it’s a key driver of anxiety, depression, and chronic stress.

And here’s the kicker: The more we think about something, the stronger those neural connections become. This is neuroplasticity in action. The more we replay our pain, the deeper those grooves become in our brains.

Why It’s So Hard to Let Go

Letting go isn’t just a mindset shift; it’s a biological process. Our bodies form an attachment to familiar emotions, even painful ones, because they create a predictable chemical response. When we hold onto anger, resentment, or grief, our bodies release cortisol and adrenaline, the same stress hormones activated during fight-or-flight. Over time, this constant flood of stress chemicals can become addictive, making it even harder to break free.

On a deeper level, holding onto pain can also give us a false sense of control. If we keep the wound fresh, we think we can prevent it from happening again. But in reality, we’re just keeping ourselves in a heightened state of stress, never fully healing, never fully moving forward.

What Happens When We Finally Let Go

The moment we decide to kill our darlings, to stop reliving the pain, something shifts:

• The amygdala (our fear center) calms down.

  
  

• The prefrontal cortex gains more control, allowing for rational thought and emotional regulation.

  
  

• The brain starts rewiring itself, weakening old neural pathways and building new ones focused on resilience, peace, and growth.

  
  

• Cortisol levels drop, and instead, our brains release dopamine and serotonin—the feel-good chemicals associated with relief, contentment, and joy.

  
  

This is why the moment we truly let something go; whether it’s a past relationship, a betrayal, or a version of ourselves that no longer fits, our bodies respond. We feel lighter, freer, and more at ease. Because we’re no longer carrying what was never meant to be ours forever.

How to Kill Your Darlings (Without Going To Jail)

Below are writing prompts to start your plan to quiet the noise, take control of your life, and kill your darlings once and for all.

• Identify what no longer serves you. 

  What are you holding onto out of habit, obligation, or fear?

  
  

• Ask: If I were starting fresh today, would I choose this? 

  If the answer is no, it’s time to let go.

  
  

• Trust that something better is on the other side. 

  Clarity comes through action, not overthinking.

  
  

• Give yourself permission to evolve. 

  You are not obligated to be the person you were yesterday. What does she look like, what are her goals, and how does she feel going forward?

  
  

The Boldest Growth Comes From Letting Go

When you kill your darlings, you create space for something greater, something sharper, more aligned, more you. So, what do you need to release? What have you been gripping so tightly that it’s keeping you from your next level?

It’s time. Let it go.

And watch what opens up next.

xoxo Cat

Your Turn—Let’s Talk!

What’s one “darling” you know it’s time to let go of? A belief, a habit, a relationship, an old version of yourself—drop it in the comments. I personally read and respond, so if you need help getting unstuck, I’ve got you.

And if this resonated with you, do me a favor and like, share, and tag a friend who needs this reminder today. Let’s build this conversation and support each other in stepping into our next level.

#KillYourDarlings #LetItGo #MidlifeReinvention #Women

Episode 2: All Tried Out: Are You Tired of Spinning Your Wheels Yet?

Episode Description & Navigation

In this episode of the Cat Rainwater Podcast, we provide a supportive and actionable guide for midlife women who feel stuck, overwhelmed, or exhausted. We explore the underlying causes, such as fear, uncertainty, and societal pressures, and introduce practical strategies to break free from mental gridlock.

This episode covers the importance of simplifying tasks, breaking goals into manageable steps, engaging in physical activities to clear the mind, and gaining clarity through intentional goal setting. Let's do the work on the critical role of self-care and mental health in this transformative journey. With real-life examples from my mentoring group, they will inspire you to take small, meaningful actions toward a life filled with purpose and excitement. I share book recommendations and additional resources available below to support this process.

Ready to break free from overwhelm and take control of your future? Tune in for a no-nonsense, real-talk episode that’ll leave you motivated and prepared to take action.

0:00 The Episode Road Map

00:58 Understanding the Feeling of Being Stuck

04:22 The Science Behind Overwhelm

05:57 Three Powerful Actions to Break Free

10:26 Achieving Clarity and Setting Goals

17:16 Real-Life Examples of Transformation

18:19 Steps to Reinvent Yourself in Midlife

24:24 Final Thoughts and Resources

Resources, Exercises & Printables:

✅ Download this checklist and start taking action today!

✅ Buy the books below and get moving into your next big life and adventures!

✅ Share this podcast and resources with friends, family, or anyone who could use a little clarity in their lives.

✅ Follow us on social media for more tips and resources on thriving in midlife.

Books to help you move forward:

Two Week Notice by Amy Porterfield

If you’re thinking about transitioning from employee to business owner, this book is a game-changer.

Amy Porterfield gives you the exact steps to take to confidently leave your job and start your own business. It’s a powerful resource for anyone ready to make the leap and finally start living their dream—on their terms.

Amy’s guidance helped me build the foundation for my business and move forward with clarity and confidence.

The Gifts of Imperfection by Brené Brown

If you’re stuck in perfectionism or feeling like you’re not enough, this book is a must-read. It’s a guide to embracing your imperfections, letting go of fear, and living with more courage and authenticity.

It helped me shift my mindset and finally let go of the idea that I had to be perfect before moving forward.

Worksheet:

Get Out of the Spin Cycle 5 Steps to Clarity and Thriving 2.15.25.pdf

Download PDF • 696KB

7 days of Motivational Quotes and Affirmations:

Day 1: Let Go of Perfectionism

Affirmation: "I release the need for perfection. I embrace progress, knowing that every step forward is a victory."

Motivational Quote: "You don’t have to get it right. You just have to get it going. The perfect moment is the one you create today."

Day 2: Find Clarity on What Matters

Affirmation: "I am clear about what matters to me. I choose to live my life aligned with my values, and I trust that my clarity will guide me."

Motivational Quote: "When you know what you want, your brain will find a way. Trust yourself to see the path forward."

Day 3: Prioritize Self-Care

Affirmation: "I honor my mind and body by prioritizing self-care. I deserve to feel rested, renewed, and ready to take on the world."

Motivational Quote:"You cannot pour from an empty cup. Fill yours up first, and watch how much you can give to the world."

Day 4: Break Goals Into Manageable Steps

Affirmation: "I break my big goals down into small steps, knowing that each one gets me closer to the life I’m creating."

Motivational Quote: "One small step today is one giant leap tomorrow. Don’t wait for the perfect time—just start."

Day 5: Take Action, Even If It’s Small

Affirmation: "I take action every day, no matter how small. Every step I take moves me closer to my vision."

Motivational Quote: "Momentum is built through action. You don’t need to see the whole staircase, just take the first step."

Day 6: Trust Your Journey

Affirmation: "I trust my journey, knowing that I am exactly where I need to be. Progress builds in layers, and I’m proud of how far I’ve come."

Motivational Quote: "Trust the process, even when you can’t see the next step. The universe is always guiding you to what you need."

Day 7: Embrace Imperfection and Growth

Affirmation: "I embrace my imperfections as part of my growth. Each stumble is a lesson, and each breakthrough is a celebration."

Motivational Quote: "Perfection is not the goal; progress is. Every step, no matter how messy, is leading you to your best self."

xoxo Cat